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In today’s post, we are learning all there is about how “every woman is love” by the amazing blogger of the month; Joy Williams

I may not look like an authority on this issue but my journey on numerous dating sprees and listening to ladies cry on my shoulder have given me an insight into the very topic I’m about to discuss. Please, stay with me.

While this isn’t also the ultimate or the only reason there is, I should also say this: do not believe anything I say (in the voice of Harv Ekar, author of Secrets of a Millionaire Mind). However, keep in mind that in the multitude of counsel lies safety. What I have come to realize is this: sometimes, there is a huge difference between what you want and who you are. Yes, take that in. These are human factors but they don’t always operate together. They are sometimes not dependent on the other.

A woman may have a list, whether written down or a mental list, of the kind of man she WANTS but she never gets him because of WHO SHE IS. What I’m trying to say is this, a woman may be glorious in character, kind, beautiful and what have you but she somehow goes on to attract the wrong kind of man. She cries and hates when her heart gets broken and talks about how she doesn’t deserve what happened to her. “I am a good woman. Why did this have to happen to me?”   Yada yada yen. 

Now, while you may be a good woman, you end up getting what you want because you attract who you are. Hold up! You are about to find out what I mean by that phrase. You are a good woman so what’s wrong with who you are? Beyond being a good woman, there are certain additions to who you are. These things include your fears, your expectations, your beliefs, your outlook among other things that make up your being.

If you will be really sincere with yourself, there are things you accept or things you reject especially because of your upbringing, background, and past experiences. These things have shaped the way you currently think.

Somewhere in your head is a woman who doesn’t want to be heartbroken so you are treading carefully and have built a wall around your heart without you even knowing. You have drawn a line and taken silent vows as to who you’d let in and who to keep out. These are the things responsible for the attraction you have for a certain kind of man: douchebags, assholes, riff-raffs, and ingrates. Men who can’t see the you that you see simply because you are afraid; men who would spit fire and treat you lesser than the queen you are because you expect all men to treat you less. 

In your head, due to the fear of being hurt again, you have become noncommittal so when they walk away from you and all the efforts you have put in, you aren’t surprised but still, you hurt. When they hurt you over and over again, you feel drained, you walk away but not without another wall molded around your heart. Right now, you have even become repellent to love! When you see a certain good man, you wonder why he wants you so you avoid him cos there are traits you expect from men in general. Babes, you deserve a good man so be a really good woman in return: Be positive! Shake off those nasty feelings! Open your heart and your arms and accept love. Stop shying away from it.

So, now that you know this, how do you change that? First, be conscious of your thoughts. Admit your fears and let them go. Believe again. Speak positively about your love life. Don’t say, “Charles, I hope you won’t hurt me”. Don’t even have that conversation in your head when you are alone. Thinking about the bad stuff and talking about them strengthen them to become real. When the thoughts come, kill them with words. Read that again: You don’t kill a thought with another thought; you kill a thought with a word.

Secondly, expect good things to happen and even when they don’t, keep expecting! I understand that hope deferred makes the heart sick but don’t give up. You eventually attract who you really are.

Lastly, confess to yourself each morning and throughout the day, “I AM LOVE” then watch your life change from bad to good. As you say it, feel it. You’d see how you begin to attract the right people and the right persons.

#WealthyBelle

#womensupportingwomen